every thought captive

"We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ." 2 Corinthians 10:5

As I've gone through ups and downs in ministry throughout this semester, I can't help but wonder how or why I can know Jesus, know His commands, know what His Word says is true of me, know that Its only with God that anything I do is possible or relevant... YET... its in my insecurities, its in my pride, its in my American need to be so darn efficient and on top of things, that I get caught up in myself and lack dependence upon God.

When I'm exposed to my own doubts, and exposed to opportunities to be self-sufficient, impatient or judgmental... I have a choice! I can 1) go with the flow and once again fall short and cling to my pride and abilities, once again allowing unhealthy thoughts to take me captive or 2)I can recognize the danger in this mindset and turn away... running back to God and the truth of His Word.

As I serve here and live life alongside college students who are on all sorts of spiritual journeys, I want to love them and be able to point them toward the God who loves them and is the only place where they could have the desires of their heart met. But in the last few weeks I've been more easily irritated and impatient... and I've recognized that I've been pouring myself out in ministry without first being filled with God's love and strength. I've been serving Him out of my own strength which is always always ALWAYS insufficient!

I must give myself first to the Lord and then to ministry. I dare say that my ministry nearly became my walk with God! I'm looking forward to going away to our Mid Year Conference for a week of focusing on Him again :)

twenty three and still going strong :)

well, i'm 23! My birthday (june 15) was a huge reminder of how blessed I am... Thanks to all my friends here and back home who showed me love and helped to make my birthday special :) So many thoughtful birthday cards and gifts, and my roommates Dani and Amanda even made me TGI Friday's potato skins! My FAVE! To top it off, we played capture the flag with our students on campus... thats what normal 23-year olds do, right? haha.

Ministry-wise, we're mostly off campus now. Heading into the 2nd week of finals, my team and I are prepping for MYC (Mid Year Conference) thats coming up June 30-july 4. I'm doing the set design, so been trying to use my creative energy to paint a banner and come up with other sweet ideas... also, i'm co-leading two ministry training seminars, so been preparing for that. One called Into the Harvest, which is about having a lifetime of evangelism, reaching people with the Gospel whoever and wherever you are... and the second one is called Personal Discipleship.. about making disciples and helping younger Christians to grow in their faith, targeted at student leaders. Its been hard for me to workout what to do with my time... and hard to deal with feeling "guilty" about not doing hands-on ministry all the time, and instead, doing more behind the scenes tasks. I'm NOT good with structure-free days... I need appointments, I need timelines, I need a plan... and the last week and half I have not had that. So this week is a new week! I have specific times to meet with students, to share my faith on campus and to even have coffee with one of the summer project Directors, Sarah. Its going to be a good week!

On the topic of summer project... theres a group from the Midwest here for another week and a half. In total, they'll be here 6 weeks, and their primary focus is to do evangelism on all 4 Griffith campuses. They have been a HUGE blessing to us! Especially since we've been off campus and not having as many conversations with non-christians as we usually are... its awesome to know that there are 12 students and 2 staff sharing their faith monday through friday for 5 whole hours! So far, I think they've seen 5 students put their faith in Christ! Praise God! He is doing amazing things through them, and will continue to do so until they head back to the states on July 2nd.

Please pray for God's continued guidance in their lives and that God will orchestrate divine appointments in their final days spent sharing their faith on campus!