nothing is a ritual.

I just finished reading "The Shack" by William P. Young. any thoughts? I guess I've heard a TON of people who despise the book... but I have to say I enjoyed it! A lot of people got all fussy about the book not being theologically accurate, but I just read it for the fictional story that it is. While it threw me off at first that God the Father was portrayed as a black woman, it totally made sense in the context of the book. God chose to reveal himself in ways that were completely opposite of Mack's 'traditional view', in order to make his faith more real... not the boring, rule-driven "religion" that he had grown accustomed to.

Nothing is a ritual.

I think this book was HUGE in my walk with the Lord right now. I suppose I have grown accustomed to the rules I have put in place that so-called "outline" what a relationship with God is supposed to look like. Nothing is a ritual! It sounds so simple! But when I find myself quickly blurting out grace as I'm already taking bites of my food, or sitting down to have a quiet time and forcing myself to journal some insightful thoughts... I now have to ask myself... Why? If I'm not doing these Christian activities out of an overflow of my love of God, then its all done in vain, isn't it?

As I continue to raise my support, I've noticed that my "ritualistic" quiet times have taken their toll on my walk with the Lord. As a result, I more easily am believing lies, or doubting in God's ability to bring in the finances that I need. When I meet with God on my own agenda I'm focused on myself and not on what He wants to show me. When I have an expectation that comes from this invented image of what my quiet times should be like... I get disappointed.

disappointed in... God?

***

Prayer requests:

1. These realizations of my "rituals" would be transformed into a deeper trust and intimacy with God

2. That I would continue to seek out the good works that God has prepared in advance for me to do... ie: blessing my family, friends, strangers with God's love that overflows

3. Support! That God would bless my efforts in making phone calls, setting up appointments, sharing my heart for this ministry with people that I meet, and bring these people to a decision in financial support.

4. A balance of TRUST and DISCIPLINE!!

God bless you!

beginning of summer update

Hi friends,

I write to you just shortly past the "half way mark" of my support deadline. Frankly, that frightens me just a tiny! I really dont know where I'm at percentage-wise, but I'll just tell you I've got plenty far to go.

Currently my life involves working 20 hours/week for my uncle who owns a townhouse painting company-- "Moen Painting". So, I'm out there painting trim around tons and tons of cookie-cutter townhouses. Its a nice change from the last 7 summers of working at DQ! Of course along with work, I am raising support for STINT. So far its been a struggle for me to try to figure out a balance of what my daily and weekly schedule actually looks like and what it is "supposed to" look like. Crusade tells me I need to be working at least 25 hours on MPD (ministry partner development) but wowza-- I know that I am not at that yet! On a positive note, things are picking up-- I have 5 appointments this week which is nearer to my goal of 6 per week than I have had so far! Praise God!

I had a really encouraging meeting with a woman from my church tonight who represents the Missions Board. She said something so simple, yet so necessary for me to be reminded of: "Dont be discouraged by a 'no' or an uncomfortable phone call. You never know what God is going to do with it." Plus, she continued to remind me that GOD alone will provide-- more than anything that I can do to network or work at raising my support-- its all in His hands. She is talking with our missions pastor tomorrow about budget stuff, so I look forward to hearing back from her soon.

I feel as though my schedule has been so busy in these first few weeks of summer, and I am thankful that God prepared me for this in my last semester of school. I'm able to go, go, go.. back to back errands and things without feeling like I'm about to explode. Even though this is feasible for me, I sense myself drifting away from the peace that God provides, and the rest that I get from spending extended time with Him.

"Don't be deceived, my dear brothers. Every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly heights, who does not change like shifting shadows. He chose to give us birth through the word of truth, that we might be a kind of first fruits of all he created."

-James 1:16-18

Prayer requests:

1. That I would work diligently at MPD along with trusting God to provide for what I need

2. That a daily/weekly schedule would be made clear and that I would be prioritizing the right things at the right time

3. That my walk with the Lord would become more intimate and less forced; that I would be able to focus on Him and not all the things that I am doing or need to be doing.